I need healing, but I dont want it.
I need community, but I dont want it.
I need deliverance, but I dont want it.
I need freedom, but I dont want it.
I need to be loved, but I dont want to recieve it.
What is wrong with me!!!! How can I know what I need to experience true life, yet be so stubborn as not to want it??? How can I still walk in sensitivity to the Holy Spirit when I am choosing to suffer??? How can I be completely fine at the same time as this is all going on??? How can I offer this stuff to people, but turn around and ignore its need in my life???
WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME???
2 years ago
4 comments:
I guess it is one of those times when you just simply say "not my will but yours be done" and do it. Yeah Yeah Yeah I know it is a sunday school answer. I love you girl. I'm praying for you.
-Sue Ann
Does stubborness come from a place of pride?
thats funny. i feel you on that one, though. seriously. well, not today. today im ok.
Because you are becoming who you already are in Christ... there is a process involved... you are growing... you may not have received all of the things you want or need yet - but think of what you have received... think of how you have changed... think of what God has done... then begin to change your perspective... get your eyes off of you and on to Him... then remember how big He is and how He likes to specialize in the hard things... even in the impossible things.. and then thank Him for how He's going to change you and heal you and free you and love you and be all things you need... even the desire to need Him.... just 'cause He's that kind of God.
And in the middle of all of this.... even your weakness, He is strong. He is YOUR strength.
Think on these things sister...and know we are with you. You are not alone.
Great grace.
Danielle
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